A few weeks ago I thought how powerful it was to PAUSE, especially in tough or tight situations. Upon googling, as expected, there is a complete book on this specific topic. Nevertheless, let me jot my thoughts here...
Given any situation - customer meeting, discussion with your manager, complex conversations with your reports, a tricky situation in the team meeting, potential argument within family - the Pause button (henceforth refered to as '', also called 'Hmmmm') is an important tactic. The other option would be to let your intuition go beserk. The goal of is to give yourself the extra second(s) required to weigh your intuiton versus other choices that may exist.
Another important value of is the opportunity it provides to refrain from reacting to the situation. The simple act of pausing, changes a "Reaction" to an "Action". Isn't it wonderful to act instead of react? Doesn't it feel more controlled?
The next time you are cornered in a spirited discussion, try using "hmmmmm.." and observe the reaction of the adversary. I would not be surprised if that person gets completely subdued or further enraged :-)
Pause or Silence is a solid effective tool in negotiations and interviews. In fact, I would go one step further - posed with a touugh decision making question – in negotiations or otherwise, just be silent, the one who speaks first invariably ‘gives in’. I have tried this with a 95%success rate. It is super tough to pause or be silent and that silence may be killing. Hold on, bite your teeth, and you will be paid off when the other person speaks first.
ReplyDelete